


Quiet Competence

by KalynaAnne



Category: Imperial Radch Series - Ann Leckie
Genre: All Ekalu all the time, Alternate POV, Backstory, Basically the plan is to flesh out Ekalu, Missing Scene, Start with some backstory and then revisit things from Ekalu's point of view
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-06
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-10-11 00:04:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20536874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KalynaAnne/pseuds/KalynaAnne
Summary: Revisiting the story from Ekalu's point of view.





	1. Chapter 1

Ekalu sits and stares at the official letter presenting her with her assignment, unsure how she feels about it.

She grew up going to a proper Radchaai school where she did well at everything and exceptionally at nothing. Where every morning they recited the school child’s version of the morning prayer

_The flower of justice is peace. __The flower of propriety is beauty in thought and action. The flower of benefit is Amaat whole and entire. I am a child of propriety and will study so that one day I can serve the cause of justice and help bring benefit to all._

Grew up also on her grandmama’s stories. Grandmama’s mama had been a child during the annexation, had survived by keeping her head down and doing her best to adapt to the Radchaai world in public. At home, in private, she had made sure Grandmama learned the old family stories and never to fully trust the Radch. Grandmama passed these stories and lessons on to Ekalu. Study hard and do well, but not so well that you call attention to yourself. Learn how to comport yourself in the company of "well-bred" Radchaai, but never forget who you are and where you come from. Justice and propriety are not the black and white the Radchaai want you to believe they are. You must always ask yourself whether something is truly proper and who is defining what is just. There is always more to any event than the official version - never believe things blindly.

Grew up with both of her mothers seemingly always away at work. Grew up watching Radchaai entertainments and acting them out with her friends and cousins, doing their best to imitate the aristocratic officers and impassive ancillaries. Grew up knowing that she would be considered provincial and low class by the heroes in her favorite shows. Grew up also knowing that Grandmama’s homemade cakes (especially the date and cinnamon ones!) were as good as any of the fancy ones served at the most proper Radchaai teas and that she would always have everything she needed (if not always everything she thought she wanted). 

She stares unseeing at the assignment letter, knowing that as a citizen of the Radch she should be honored to be chosen for a military position, but unable to forget the stories great grandmama passed down about the horrors the military committed during the annexation. It’s one thing to play at being a soldier with her friends. It’s another thing entirely to consider the fact that she has actually been assigned to be one. Finally she nods slowly. Regardless of her feelings, this is her assignment. It is only proper to make the best of it.

She takes the letter to grandmama who reads it, draws in a sharp breath, and then closes her eyes and lets the breath out in a long, slow sigh. “Oh Ekalu…” Grandmama pulls her into a tight hug before pulling back slightly and tilting Ekalu’s chin up to look at her, “my dear child. I’m sure you know this isn’t the path I would have chosen for you, but you are strong in body, mind and spirit. You are strong enough to do well and strong enough not to lose yourself in the process.” She smiles slightly, “At least they’ve stopped the annexations, so you won’t have to deal with that.” 

Things move quickly and soon Ekalu finds herself on a shuttle up to the station and then off to basic training. As usual, she does well but not so well as to draw attention. She passes training and receives her new designation: One Amaat Nine on _ Mercy of Kalr. _ During orientation on _ Mercy of Kalr _ she learns that her new captain, Vel Osck, expects her soldiers to act like ancillaries. The senior members of Amaat decade, who have been on the ship for a while, quietly warn her about their officers and that she should never refer to them by name or rank if she doesn’t want Ship to be required to report what she has said. Ship will watch out for them, but it has to obey orders, so they work with Ship. 

Ekalu reaches back to those carefree days when she and her friends used to play at being ancillaries and builds herself a mask. Slowly but surely, she masters the art of appearing passive and blank regardless of what she is actually feeling. It’s awful and dehumanizing, but she learns that it can also be an advantage. If you are always impassive, the officers don’t know when you are appalled by their behavior. In many ways, ancillaries are invisible and anonymous. Ekalu leans into that. By keeping her head down and quietly and effectively doing her job, she slowly works her way up through the decade. She tries not to think about the fact that her “promotions” are effectively about the fact that she is outlasting her decade mates. Tries not to think about why they are leaving (knows that nothing good would come of it if she tried to speak up). She does her best and cares for Ship and tries to make things easier for her decade mates and knows that Ship cares for her and her fellow soldiers, even if their officers don‘t.

Their captain is more worried about social status and things like hosting dinner parties than actually captaining the ship, so she often leaves the ship in command of its Amaat lieutenant and her decade while captain Vel visits the local station to hold court at tea shops. Their Amaat lieutenant isn't a great person herself, but at least with the captain and some of the lieutenants off on the station there are fewer people to potentially overstep their authority or abuse the crew. Ekalu, now Amaat One, now decade leader, and her decade mates keep their heads down and quietly and competently do their jobs. They take care of Ship and Ship takes care of them and does its best to run interference when the officers are in a mood that could lead to harm for the crew.

It's not a great life, but it's her life. It’s predictable and Ekalu knows exactly what is expected of her.

Then comes a crazy whirlwind of a day.

Unexpectedly, they lose all contact with Omaugh Station. There’s no news, no contact with any of the crew on the station. Everyone is tense and not quite sure what to do. After a couple hours, a rumor spreads through the ship that someone has hijacked the one of Ship’s shuttles that was docked at Omaugh palace and gone and blown it up. The details are unclear and every new version of the story that Ekalu hears conflicts with what she had pieced together previously. Eventually communications with Station come back on, but things just keep getting worse. The captain and all of the _Mercy of Kalr_ lieutenants on the station have been arrested for treason and _Mercy of Kalr_ receives orders to send its Amaat lieutenant to the station to be arrested. As One Amaat One, Ekalu is suddenly acting Lieutenant.

She’s not just acting Lieutenant, she’s now effectively the ranking officer and given command of Ship. She and Medic are, in fact, the _only_ officers Ship has. The entire world has been completely turned upside down: there’s chaos on Omaugh Palace Station and now Ekalu has command of her ship. She tries to tell _Mercy of Kalr_ that she isn’t officer material, that the aptitudes didn’t suggest that she should be an officer, but Ship reassures her and reminds her that it is there to help and so a completely overwhelmed Ekalu takes command. Now, acting as an officer, she can no longer hide behind an ancillary mask and merely follow orders. She actually has to issue orders. _Mercy of Kalr_ is wonderful and the only touchstone Ekalu really has left in the midst of the chaos. Ship frequently reassures her that everything will be ok, that Ship is working on getting them a new captain who will bring additional lieutenants and that Ekalu is doing exactly what she should be doing. Ship has complete faith in Ekalu’s abilities (even when Ekalu has no faith in them at all). 

Ekalu tries to believe Ship, but for far too many days, it's just Ekalu and Ship and Medic holding things together. Ekalu tries to figure out how to be a good officer. It's not like she has had any good role models (outside of entertainments perhaps, but those really don’t count)- she knows more what she *doesn't* want to be like as Lieutenant than what she does want to be like. Ekalu and Medic take turns tensely standing watch, praying to Amaat that the chaos that is gripping the station doesn’t escape it any more than it already has. Ekalu makes sure that her decade mates...her former decade mates... now her soldiers...continue to take care of themselves and of Ship and trusts that Ship will continue to take care of them. And she feels like she is a child again, play acting at being an officer, but she does her best.

And then, at long last, Ship has her send a shuttle down to the palace to collect their new captain and a new lieutenant. Ship warns them that their new captain was injured in the fighting on the station, so Medic goes with the shuttle just in case she is needed. Ekalu relaxes very slightly. She’s definitely ready to stop being in command, but Ship isn’t exactly giving her any details about their new captain. Ship seems pleased though, so Ekalu is cautiously hopeful. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This whole thing started with me ranting about how much I love Ekalu into a google doc. And then it started having fic snippets mixed in with the character analysis and general flailing. And then suddenly it was over 5000 words... So I'm cleaning it up into fic. [Edit: When I first posted I thought this might end up being 3 chapters. We're clearly past that now...]
> 
> The first part of the military morning prayer doesn't feel particular to the military and I can't imagine the Radch passing up an opportunity to... indoctrinate... its school children, especially in places that were annexed relatively recently. 
> 
> There are a few tricky things I've discovered while diving deeply into the text. Anaander Mianaai tells Breq that _as a fleet captain_ she is entitled to a third Lieutenant. Does this mean that a regular captain isn't? Did _Mercy of Kalr_ not have a third Lieutenant under captain Vel Osck? The story strongly suggests that all of the decades had served under captain Vel, so I'm just going to brush this one under the rug. 
> 
> When Ekalu is promoted to Lieutenant, that's going to leave an opening in Amaat decade. Does it get filled? Is someone brought up from one of the other decades? What about that shuttle pilot that Breq shot in the leg? Does she end up rejoining the crew? If not, is she replaced? We never hear anything about any new soldiers joining the crew, but Breq tells us that there are 20 Kalrs and 10 members of each of the other decades, which suggests there must have been at least one. I can believe that Breq would miss this, but Ekalu wouldn't, so I need to figure out how to handle it. If anyone has any thoughts or wants to bat around ideas (about this or anything else IR!) I would love to hear from you :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to figure out how _Mercy of Kalr_ sorted out the staffing issue in the decades before I could write this chapter. I don't think it is necessary to follow this story, but if you're interested, the companion story is [Don't Underestimate a Mercy](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20547785).

Ekalu is tensely sitting alone in Command, waiting for Medic to report back on their new captain, when Ship suddenly gives a contented sort of hum. Ekalu waits for a moment and, when _Mercy of Kalr_ doesn’t seem inclined to offer information, asks “Ship?” 

“Oh, Medic just reconnected the four soldiers that are returning and it’s so nice to have them back. She is just waiting on our new captain and lieutenant now. They should be arriving at the docks soon.”

Ekalu narrows her eyes, “Ship? She reconnected _four_ returning soldiers? Isn’t Kalr Six coming back?”

“She is, but Kalrs Eight and Fifteen and Etrepa Four are not and then with you being promoted to lieutenant we had four positions to fill.”

Ekalu freezes. “What do you mean _with me being promoted to lieutenant?_ I’m Amaat One and I will, of course, serve as needed until the new captain can bring her own lieutenants, but I’m not _actually_ a lieutenant.”

“Not _yet_, but as soon as the captain gets here and settled in, I intend to recommend that she make you our Etrepa lieutenant.”

“But Ship!” cries Ekalu, despairing, “It doesn’t work like that! It’s one thing for me to take command when there’s nothing else to be done, but common soldiers don’t get promoted to lieutenant. Ship, it just isn’t done!”

_Mercy of Kalr_ pauses briefly and then asks, “Ekalu, do you trust me?”

“_Of course_ I trust you! It’s just… Ship…” Ekalu hesitates, brow furrowed and then gently presses her hand to the wall of the command deck and continues silently, “Ship… you’ve just lost all of your officers… are you sure you're thinking entirely clearly?” 

In her ear, just as calmly as always, _Mercy of Kalr_ replies, “Ekalu, you are steadier than many of the officers I’ve had and I know I can trust you to care for the soldiers under your command. I want you as my lieutenant.” Then, out loud, “I’m sending Amaat Two to bring you tea.”

Ekalu sighs, “Yes, Ship, thank you,” then adds silently “but I’m still not convinced this is a good idea.”

She accepts the tea and sips at it while she stands watch and listens to Ship sorting out everyone’s new numbers, mildly irked at how unfair it is that Ship always sounds so calm, collected, and matter of fact, regardless of how crazy things get. It means that even if Ship decides to suggest something completely crazy, it eventually starts sounding almost reasonable. 

_______

Several hours later the shuttle returns, bringing with it Captain Breq _Mianaai_ and Lieutenant _Seivarden Vendaai._ Medic immediately bustles their new captain off to Medical. Lieutenant Seivarden tries to follow, but _Mercy of Kalr_ sends Amaat One (the just promoted Amaat Two) to intercept her, show her to her quarters, and help her settle in. It sends Etrepa Eight to make tea for Ekalu in Command. 

Ekalu accepts the tea with a small smile and thanks Eight who nods a slight bow, “You’re welcome, Sir.”

Ekalu fights the sudden urge to cringe - she isn’t someone to call “Sir” - and then notes that Eight has fallen back into her ancillary blankness. She realizes that Eight is just as uncomfortable with the situation as she is and, uncertain what to do, queries Ship. Ship speaks calmly and silently to both of them, “I know everything is strange right now, but it will all work out. You’ll get used to it. Eight, why don’t you go pack up and clear out the Etrepa officer’s quarters for your new lieutenant.” 

As Eight leaves, Ekalu leans back in her chair in Command, cradles her tea bowl with both hands and silently, hesitantly, asks _Mercy of Kalr_, “Is our new Captain _really_ a Mianaai?” Ship delays answering just long enough for Ekalu to notice the pause. “Her name is Breq Mianaai, yes.” Ekalu considers the pause, considers the fact that Ship seems actively happy to have this new Mianaai captain even if Ekalu is wary, and continues silently, “Ship… what aren’t you telling me?” Quickly this time, Ship responds, “Captain Breq’s past is her own. It’s not my place to say. But I am confident that she will be a good captain and that she will be nothing like Captain Vel.” 

For a couple of days the new captain commands the ship from her bed in Medical. One of the first things she does is fully approve the command and staffing structure that _Mercy of Kalr_ suggests, including Ekalu’s promotion to Etrepa lieutenant. 

At the end of her shift on watch, Ekalu sits on the padded bench that will serve as her bed in her new private Etrepa lieutenant quarters, leans against the wall, buries her head in her hands and silently reaches out to Ship, “Oh Ship…” and trails off. Ship responds gently, “I have every confidence in you, Lieutenant. Get some sleep.” As she lays in bed, trying to fall asleep, alone, not surrounded by decade mates for the first time in years, Ekalu reflects on the fact that her life has become a particularly over the top entertainment. She remembers watching such entertainments as a child and pretending to be one of the aristocratic officers. Now she, somehow, is an officer. And her fellow officers are a mysterious Mianaai captain and the legendary Captain Seivarden Vendaai. Even if ship is right and she _is_ cut out to be an officer, how is she supposed to be anything even remotely close to their equal?

The next morning _Mercy of Kalr_ gently wakes Ekalu shortly before Etrepa Eight arrives at her quarters, a bowl of tea in one hand, a neatly folded uniform jacket draped over her other arm, and a box tucked under the arm with the jacket. “Good Morning Lieutenant.” She hands Ekalu the tea bowl and sets the box down on a chair. “Ship sent your measurements to Station and your new lieutenant’s jackets were sent up on the last shuttle.” She gestures to the jacket she’s holding. “Once you finish your tea we’ll need to make sure they fit properly.” She gestures to the box. “Ship also had officer training materials sent up for you to study when you have the time. Ship says to tell you that you are welcome to bring them with you when you are standing watch.” She hesitates, “And, Sir,” hesitates again, “We, that is, Etrepa decade, well… this is all going to take some getting used to for all of us… but we want you to know that we _are_ happy to have you sir.” 

Ekalu accepts the bowl and sips her tea as she listens attentively to Etrepa Eight and tries to believe that this is all really happening. When Eight finishes, Ekalu gestures her thanks to both Eight and Ship. “Eight… give Etrepa my thanks and let them know that I will do my best and will try to be a credit to your decade.“ She quickly finishes her tea, sets the bowl aside and stands up. “I guess we had best sort out that jacket.” 

Ekalu does her best to hide how awkward she feels as Eight helps her dress and fusses with the new jacket. Eight looks her over critically and has Ekalu turn so she can see the jacket from all angles. “Well, it’s not perfect, but it’s about as good as we could hope for from Station without you being there in person for tailoring.” She pauses and Ekalu suspects she is consulting with Ship. “Ship says it doesn’t see a good opportunity to send you down to Station, but if there is anything you need or want you should put together a shopping list and one of us from Etrepa can go down with Sir in a couple of days when she has recovered enough and take care of it for you.” Eight glances pointedly around Ekalu’s completely empty quarters. Ekalu suppresses a sigh, “I’ll think about it Ship.”

Eight pauses, clearly listening to ship this time, and then, ancillary blank, she says, “Begging your pardon Lieutenant, Four needs help with something,” before collecting Ekalu’s empty tea bowl and leaving at Ekalu’s gestured approval. 

Ekalu is about to ask Ship if that was a sign that there is something she needs to take care of in Etrepa decade when Ship reaches out to her, “I could tell you needed a break. They will be back with breakfast for you in a bit, but for now why don’t you open that box.”

In the box, nestled with an officer training manual, a manual on the maintenance of Mercy class ships, and a Radchaai military policy booklet, Ekalu finds a small statue of Kalr and an Etrepa. Ekalu gently picks up the Kalr, “Ship…” 

“It’s yours, Lieutenant. You can consider them promotion gifts. Any officer of mine should have a Kalr and as Etrepa lieutenant you should have an Etrepa.”

Ekalu carefully places them in the provided niche and briefly frowns, “Ship, I don’t have any offerings for them. And… it isn’t proper to have gods without having Amaat…” 

“Well then,” _Mercy of Kalr_ says calmly, “You’ve found something to put on that shopping list Eight thinks you need.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've tried to get all of the capitalization and italics correct, but goodness this universe makes it tricky. I've probably missed something somewhere - if you point it out I'll be happy to fix it. I've also tried very hard to make sure I always use "it" for MoK rather than "she," but I wouldn't be surprised if I got that wrong somewhere either. Referring to character as "it" takes a lot of getting used to. 
> 
> I've decided to accept the fact that I keep finding more little things I want to poke at, so I no longer have a good idea how long I expect this fic to end up. Ekalu is fantastic and deserves the time spent exploring her character. I'd love to hear any thoughts or comments!


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next couple of days, Ekalu begins to settle uncomfortably into a new routine. Eight is there every morning with a bowl of tea, ready to convey any instructions from Ship and to make sure she is ready to start the day. She studies the officer training manual as she takes her shifts standing watch in Command and sets a rotation so that all ten of her Etrepas have turns joining her on watch. She grudgingly accepts the fact that Four often insists on preparing meals other than skel for her and does her best not to show how uncomfortable this makes her, how strange it is to be eating alone in the decade room with an Etrepa standing by to serve her instead of with her decade in the soldiers’ mess. She works hard during her assigned times in the gym and firing range, striving to make sure her numbers meet the standard expected from officers. She supervises and inspects her decade during their daily chores and resists the instinct to join in the scrubbing. She spends her free time alone in her quarters studying the training manual or watching old entertainments that she knows well from her childhood, quietly speaking the lines along with the officers in the show, practicing the accent and phrasings that she associates with proper Radchaai officers. As hard as it is to adapt so quickly, the last thing she wants to do is call extra attention to herself.

Throughout all of this, she also quietly observes. She notices that Lieutenant Seivarden spends as much time as she can get away with in Medical fussing over their new captain. Notices when the captain leaves Medical and moves into her quarters before Medic is ready for her to. Notices that their captain seems to be perpetually angry. Ekalu supposes that is a fair reaction to the current general state of the Radch, but it only reinforces her desire to fly under the radar as much as possible. The exact nature of Lieutenant Seivarden and the Captain’s relationship is uncertain, but they seem close enough that part of avoiding Captain’s attention is probably avoiding Seivarden’s attention. And, besides, Ekalu is quite sure that her attempts at presenting herself as a proper officer would fall flat if compared too closely with Seivarden and her seemingly effortless elegance. Luckily the differences in their schedules make it easy enough for for Ekalu to avoid much interaction with her fellow officers. Captain, thankfully, seems to be content with very basic, functional reports which Ekalu can manage well enough. 

As she watches and considers, Ekalu quietly resigns herself to the fact that, despite serving on Ship for a long time, she's going to be the outsider. There’s Medic, but Medic is Medic. She trusts Medic and likes her well enough, but she isn’t exactly a friend. All of the soldiers in the decades knew her when she was one of them. She’s been separated from her fellow Amaats who are now expected to give their loyalty to their new lieutenant. And her Etrepas… trying to fill her place as their lieutenant is hard enough without complicating matters. 

\-----

After about a week, Captain Breq recovers enough to go and take care of whatever business she has on the station. _Mercy of Kalr_ sends their captain in a shuttle along with a few Kalrs to attend to her and Etrepa Three with Ekalu’s shopping list. Ekalu didn’t want to bother with the shopping list, but Ship pointed out that as a lieutenant she was expected to have more personal effects than a common soldier. Reluctantly and with much prodding from Ship, she put together a list, including a request for a couple of packets of dates and a small jar of cinnamon. 

By the time the shuttle returns, Captain Breq has become Fleet Captain Breq. She also has another new Lieutenant in tow: Tisarwat, a 17 year old with lilac eyes whose first impression on Ekalu isn't at all promising. Ekalu is there to greet the shuttle along with Bo decade and a few Kalrs. The Kalrs quickly set about unloading the shuttle and, after brief introductions, Ekalu and Etrepa Three leave with the boxes Three claims. Ekalu tries to tell herself that their quick exit has nothing to do with running away and everything to do with efficiency.

When they get to Ekalu’s quarters, Three sets the boxes down on the bench and then turns to Ekalu. “Begging your indulgence Lieutenant, but I thought you might want to know. As you could probably see, the new lieutenant is just a baby and, well, Sir… Sir hasn’t been singing, and as best as the Kalrs and I could tell it’s because she’s angry at being assigned a baby.” Then, more hesitantly, “So far none of us have seen any evidence that Sir is mad about having _you_…” she trails off. 

Ekalu lets out a slightly shaky breath. Her soldier’s point is clearly that, while she’s no 17 year old and has at least spent time on a military ship, Ekalu is in many ways just as much of a baby lieutenant herself and if Sir is that angry about having one baby lieutenant… Ekalu nods slowly, “Thank you Three.” 

Three bows, takes one of the boxes and requests permission to go unpack it into storage in the decade room. Ekalu gestures her approval and turns to the remaining boxes with a sigh. As she arranges a couple of new cushions and finishes setting up the niche with her gods, Ekalu renews her commitment to keeping her head down, quietly doing her best, and spending as much time studying her officer’s training manual as possible. 

A mere six hours after the shuttle returned, _Mercy of Kalr _makes the jump to gate space. For two days in gate space things seem to go about as smoothly as Ekalu could hope. Then Medic shows up in Command to relieve Ekalu on watch and is clearly furious. Ekalu watches the silent, gestured conversation between her Etrepas and the Kalrs that have arrived with Medic and learns that apparently Medic showed up to Sir’s quarters angry that morning and then left just as angry but that no one has worked out what exactly is going on. 

Ekalu makes sure her Etrepas are set for cleaning duty and then returns to her quarters to study while they scrub. When she returns to inspect their work, she finds her soldiers embroiled in an intense but whispered conversation. One of the corridors they are in charge of is right outside of the shooting range. Apparently Sir is just as riled up as Medic, exceedingly impressive in the firing range--her soldiers have to be exaggerating--and Lieutenant Seivarden is unexpectedly foul mouthed. 

The next day, Ekalu passes frantically scrubbing Bos on her way to the decade room for breakfast. As Four serves her breakfast, Ekalu asks if she has heard what is going on with Bo. Four looks around to make sure they are alone and then quietly responds, “Sir, according to Etrepa Six who heard it from Kalr 10, Kalr Five was in the room when Sir lit into the baby and now all of Bo is in trouble for shirking in their cleaning duties… Begging your indulgence, lieutenant, but some of what they got in trouble for is stuff that none of us in any of the decades have been doing and, well…”

Ekalu gestures her understanding. Sir is clearly being unfair to the baby and Bo decade and everyone else is wondering if Sir is going to turn on them next, and Etrepa is unsure if their lieutenant can do anything about it, but they’re hoping. “I’ll see what I can do, Four. Thank you.”

Four refills her lieutenant’s tea bowl and then stands quietly in the corner, face impassive, waiting until she is needed. Ekalu sips her tea and thinks. If Sir is upset about having lieutenants who don’t know what they are doing, the last thing her decade needs is for her to go directly to Sir herself. That sounds like a good way to accidentally get her own decade an extra cleaning detail. But… maybe Lieutenant Seivarden would be able to approach Sir, and she might have ways of calming Sir down. And, maybe, Ekalu can bring herself to approach Lieutenant Seivarden about it. 

Ekalu finishes her tea, rises from the table, and adjusts her jacket to make sure it is sitting right. Then she takes a deep breath, nods to Four who is already cleaning up, and walks as confidently as she can to Command to relieve Lieutenant Seivarden. A short, awkward exchange later, Seivarden has gestured her assent that she will see if there is anything she can do and Ekalu settles into the chair in Command, taking slow deep breaths as she tries to calm her racing heart. Once she has calmed down and _Mercy of Kalr_ has given her a brief status update on their trip through gate space, Ekalu asks, “Ship, why didn’t you tell me that there were tasks that we were missing on cleaning duty?” 

“It never seemed like the right time, Lieutenant, and they are all things I can’t actually see, so I don’t think about them constantly.”

Ekalu nods slowly, “I see.” She turns to Etrepa Five who is on rotation to stand watch with her and hands her the officer training manual. “Five, could you take this back to my quarters and bring me the ship maintenance manual?” Five accepts the training manual, bows slightly to Ekalu, and sets off on her assigned errand. While she waits for Five to return, Ekalu directs her attention back to her ship. “Ship… can you tell me what has Sir and Medic so angry? You do know, right?”

After a long pause _Mercy of Kalr _replies calmly, “I do. I’m confident the Fleet Captain is working to resolve it. There’s nothing you need to worry about, Lieutenant.” 

Ekalu isn’t as reassured as she suspects Ship would like her to be, but acknowledges to herself that there probably isn’t anything she can do directly to help with whatever is going on. When Five returns with the ship manual, Ekalu settles in to read. The one thing she _does_ know right now is that they haven’t been taking care of Ship properly for a long time and that she apparently doesn’t even know how to take care of Ship properly. And as good as Ship has been about supporting Ekalu, it apparently doesn’t think it’s important to tell her when she isn’t doing inspections carefully enough. This, at least, is a concrete thing that Ekalu can work on. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I would love any comments or feedback :)
> 
> As a heads up, in the next chapter we're going to get more of Seivarden and I suspect that writing Ekalu and Seivarden interacting is going to be tricky, so it might take a little longer to get it worked out.


	4. Chapter 4

By the time Ekalu’s next watch shift rolls around, Sir is shut up in Medical with Medic and the baby and all anyone knows is that Tisarwat was clearly in bad shape when Sir called for Kalr to help get her to Medical. Ekalu has tried to ask Ship multiple times, but all she gets are variations on, “The Fleet Captain has things under control, Lieutenant. You don’t need to worry about it.” Once again Ekalu spends her watch shift studying her copy of the ship maintenance manual.

As Ekalu approaches the end of her watch shift, Ship lets her know that Medic is still busy and won’t be coming to relieve her. Ekalu resigns herself to taking a double shift on watch and asks Ship to send her Etrepas to meet her in Command.

Etrepa decade gathers quickly and stands at attention, all faces ancillary blank. Ekalu silently notes that every soldier has her uniform perfect. She nods approvingly to her decade.

“I know everyone wants to know what is going on, but, unfortunately, I don’t know any more than you do. Ship assures me that everything is under control and should be back to normal soon.” Ekalu isn’t sure what normal even means at this point, but there’s no need to bring that up now. “We all saw Bo on their extra cleaning detail.” Ekalu hesitates slightly, “I don’t know the details behind that assignment,” which is as close as Ekalu is willing to come to acknowledging out loud the fact that it was blatantly unfair—she’s fairly certain her decade will understand what she means to say—“but I’ve been studying, “ she holds up the maintenance manual, “and it turns out there _are_ quite a few things that _all_ of us have been neglecting for a very long time. None of you are in trouble. _I_ didn’t know any better and I suspect that most, if not all, of you didn’t either. Now that we do know, we need to act on it.” Ekalu places a gloved hand gently on the console she is standing next to, “Ship takes care of us. Some of you are very aware of just how far Ship is willing to go to take care of us. We need to make sure we are taking care of it.” Ekalu is pleased when her soldiers all quickly gesture their agreement. “Right. If anyone wants to borrow this,” she holds up the manual again, “let me know. There are a few things that need to be added to the regular cleaning rotations…”

Ship sends a clearly worried Seivarden to relieve Ekalu after her double shift on watch and Ekalu goes to inspect her Etrepas. She is pleased to find that they have completed all of their usual tasks and the new additions and thanks them for helping her take better care of Ship.

The next morning, Etrepa Eight brings Ekalu news along with her morning tea. “Begging the lieutenant’s indulgence, the baby lieutenant is back in her quarters. Apparently Military Administration sent her to us when she wasn’t actually in shape to ship out. Somehow Administration tried to hide whatever it was that was wrong, but _they_ took care of something yesterday and now she’s on bedrest for at least a couple of days. Bo One is standing in for her.” Ship adds in Ekalu’s ear, “The Fleet Captain, Seivarden, and Medic are all currently asleep. Bo One is currently standing her first watch. She is nervous and overwhelmed, but doing well.” Ekalu keeps her expression blank as she suppresses a sigh and gestures thanks for the information to both Eight and Ship.

After a quick breakfast in the decade room, Ekalu turns to Four. “I’m going to go keep Bo One company for the end of her watch shift. Can you bring us tea in a few minutes?” Four gestures assent and sets about cleaning up Ekalu’s dishes.

As Ekalu walks toward Command, Ship quietly tells her that Four is quite pleased that Ekalu has actually asked her for something. Ekalu’s only response is a brief gesture of acknowledgement.

In Command, Ekalu finds Bo One sitting tensely. As soon as she notices Ekalu she goes to get up, but Ekalu gestures for her to stay seated. “You still have half an hour or so on your shift, Bo, but I thought you might appreciate company.” Ekalu looks out toward the nothingness of gatespace as Bo One stays still and silent. “I know what it’s like to be suddenly thrown into this kind of position.” She gives Bo One a small smile, then turns back to the window. “Hopefully your Lieutenant will be better soon. In the meantime, Ship will support you of course, but I wanted to make sure you know that you can also come to me if you are overwhelmed or need help with something.” Bo One, sitting stiffly, expression ancillary blank, gives a small gesture of acknowledgement. “I’m still figuring some things out myself, but, if you do find something I don’t know, we can figure it out together.”

Worried by Bo One’s continued silence, Ekalu gestures to Ship, asking whether she is making things worse. In her ear, Ship reassures her, “You are doing well, Lieutenant. She appreciates it, she is just also very overwhelmed. Etrepa Four is almost here with the tea.” Ekalu relaxes slightly and turns to look more directly at Bo One as Etrepa Four enters. “Would you like tea, Bo?”

Four silently offers a tea bowl and Bo One looks up at her and gestures thanks as she accepts it. She cradles the bowl in both hands for a long moment before taking a slow sip. As she finally manages to relax slightly, she turns to Ekalu and says quietly, “Thank you, Lieutenant.” Ekalu nods to her with a smile and takes a sip from her own bowl of tea. They continue the rest of Bo One’s watch in companionable, if slightly tense, silence, with Etrepa Four refreshing their tea when needed.

\-----

A couple of days later while Ekalu is on watch, Sir stops by Command to invite Ekalu to join her and Lieutenant Tisarwat for a meal later that day. Ekalu naturally accepts, doing her best to hide how nervous the thought makes her. Eight helps her dress for supper after her bath that evening, carefully adjusting Ekalu’s jacket and nodding decisively. Ekalu has been pretending not to notice as her Etrepas have been tweaking her jackets. It seems this one finally meets with Eight’s approval. Ship helps them make sure they arrive to the decade room just after Tisarwat and Bo Nine. As they enter, Etrepa Four, who had been helping Kalr Five prepare the meal, catches Eight’s eye and quickly gestures her mild annoyance that Kalr Five has taken charge and been fussing about the plates before taking her leave. Eight goes to stand with Bo Nine and Ekalu takes the place at the table that Sir gestures her to.

Kalr Five serves their meal and they start to eat in silence. When Ekalu can’t take the awkward silence any longer, she decides that complimenting the plates should be a safe enough topic of conversation. If nothing else, Kalr Five will appreciate it. Much to her dismay, it turns out that the plates are actually ancient and Sir’s casual dismissal of that fact serves to remind Ekalu just how out of place she is here. When this is immediately followed by a direct request that Ekalu be less formal she despairs a bit. In her ear, Ship gently reminds her that even if she feels out of place, she _is_ a lieutenant and was specifically invited to this meal.

Then Sir relays Seivarden’s claim that Amaat is the best decade. Ekalu recognizes this game. Lieutenants posturing to each other about the superiority of their decades has been a common trope in entertainments since they started portraying human troops and not just ancillaries. She tries to imitate an officer from one of these entertainments, realizes that it is coming out exceptionally awkwardly, and does her best to rephrase the same idea into something she might actually say.

By the end of the meal, Sir has issued a challenge. She wants the Etrepa and Bo decades to focus on their skills in the firing range and to practice with shields. In a week, whichever decade has the better numbers will be given three bottles of arrack. If Ekalu has managed to read between Sir’s lines correctly, there are two things going on. Sir isn’t content with her crew being merely _standard_, and Sir is hoping that this will help the baby lieutenant’s recovery somehow. She suspects that Sir wants Bo decade to win that arrack. Ekalu tries not to resent the feeling that Sir is using her decade here. Reminds herself that she and her decade would both rather have Sir’s attention on Bo and not on them.

That night, before Ekalu and her Etrepas head to bed, Ekalu issues armor to each of her soldiers and herself. She knows Eight will have already passed along the challenge, but she relays it to them formally and strongly encourages each soldier to do her best.

\-----

The next morning Ekalu arrives in Command to relieve Lieutenant Seivarden, as usual. As she is leaving, Seivarden pauses and turns back, leaning casually against the doorway. “Lieutenant Ekalu, would you do me the honor of joining me for a meal when you finish your watch shift?”

Ekalu’s eyes widen slightly before she schools her face back into its usual neutral expression and, doing her best to round her vowels in imitation of Seivarden’s own accent, responds “Of course, Sir, the honor is mine.”

Seivarden responds with a careless smile, “Lieutenant, the ‘Sir’ is completely unnecessary. Seivarden is fine.”

Ekalu takes a deep breath, nods to her, and somehow manages to reply in a steady voice, “Seivarden, then. Please, I’m Ekalu.”

Seivarden nods back, “I look forward to our meal, Ekalu.” She bows with a slightly suggestive flourish of her hand before turning and sauntering down the corridor.

Ekalu stands very still until she is confident Seivarden is well away and then lowers herself a little shakily to the chair and turns to Etrepas Two and Three, who are taking this watch shift with her and have been standing silently with their usual ancillary blank expressions. “Did...did that really just happen?”

Two turns to prepare tea for her Lieutenant as Three says calmly, “It did, Sir. I’ve messaged Four so she can coordinate the meal with Amaat.”

Ekalu accepts a bowl from Two and thanks her for the tea. As she drinks her tea she tries to work through this development. Seivarden is gorgeous and confident and aristocratic and everything an officer should be. Ekalu is all too aware that she herself is none of those things. She would never admit it to anyone, but she has fantasized about approaching Seivarden, about kneeling to her. She never expected to actually act on those fantasies, let alone that Seivarden would ever approach _her, _especially not like this, like she sees her as an equal. Their old Amaat Lieutenant… No. She’s not going to think about that right now.

First, she—common, provincial Ekalu—was promoted unexpectedly to lieutenant. Now she has the legendary, aristocratic Seivarden inviting her to dinner with a clear, if unspoken, suggestion that it could lead to more. This is the kind of thing that happens in entertainments, not in real life… Mindful of the fact that her Etrepas are watching, Ekalu reaches out silently to ask, “Ship… I really am living in an entertainment, aren’t I?”

Ship replies gently in her ear, “You should give yourself more credit all around, Lieutenant. She truly does find you attractive.” Ship pauses as Two refills Ekalu’s tea. “Try to relax while you finish your shift and then go enjoy the meal and her company.”

\-----

At the end of her shift she is met by Etrepa Eight who whisks her off to help her get ready for her meal with Seivarden. Ekalu is a bit bemused by this, but Eight seems particularly determined, so Ekalu goes along with it.

When Ekalu arrives at the decade room, Seivarden bows. “Thank you for joining me, Ekalu.” She gestures Ekalu to the table before taking a seat across from her.

Ekalu sits and tries to hide how nervous she is as she responds, paying careful attention to her accent, “It’s my pleasure Si...Seivarden. I hope I didn’t keep you waiting?”

Seivarden smiles easily. “Not at all.” She gestures to Amaat Two and Etrepa Four who have been waiting in the corner and now step forward to serve their lieutenants. “Our soldiers seem to have prepared something interesting for us. I didn’t realize the ship had such a spice collection.”

Ekalu automatically gestures her thanks to Four as she serves her and then freezes momentarily, surprised by the spiced vegetable and fish dish in front of her, suddenly recognizing the smell she had been too distracted to fully process. She glances at Four who gives her a quick smug smile before retreating back into her ancillary blank expression. “Ah, I asked Etrepa to pick up some spices before we left Omaugh Palace.” She takes a bite and hums appreciatively, finally relaxing enough to give Seivarden a smile. “I think our soldiers used them quite well.” Silently, under the table she gestures to Ship, asking it to thank Three for picking up more than just the cinnamon she had specifically requested.

Seivarden tries a bite. “Well, that’s different.” She considers as she takes another bite. “It’s quite good though. I suppose recipes can change a lot in a thousand years.”

Ekalu’s smile tightens slightly as she resists the urge to point out that this particular recipe wouldn’t have been served in the Radch a thousand years ago because the planet it comes from hadn’t been annexed yet. “I suppose so.” Ekalu slowly savors her meal, making the occasional encouraging comment as Seivarden tells her all about the foods she used to like a thousand years ago that don’t seem to be around now, or are at least not easily found. It’s not the most interesting topic Ekalu could imagine, but it’s a significant improvement over the awkward silence from her meal with Sir and the baby the day before.

As Seivarden is finishing her meal, she notes, “Of course, Radchaai have been eating skel since long before my time. That, at least, doesn’t change.”

Amused by the notion that they at least have skel in common even if nothing else, Ekalu lets out a small laugh. “I suspect Radchaai will be eating skel for as long as there are Radchaai.”

“Indeed.” Seivarden stands, stretches luxuriously and gestures an invitation to Ekalu. “Would you care to join me in my quarters for a bit of, ah, stress relief?”

Ekalu feels her heart rate quicken and her cheeks warm as she stands and moves around the table to take Seivarden’s arm. “That sounds lovely, S...Seivarden.”

\-----

A bit later Ekalu finds herself more relaxed than she has been in a long while, cuddled up with a sleepy Seivarden. She wasn’t originally quite sure what to expect from Seivarden, but is _very_ pleased to have discovered that, even if Seivarden isn’t the most considerate person in general, she is a _more_ than considerate lover. As she contemplates this, Ekalu remembers that just a few days ago she was hinting that Seivarden might see if she could help _Sir_ with stress relief, wonders how that worked out, and finds the courage to ask directly.

Seivarden’s answers raise more questions than they resolve. Ekalu briefly ponders what could possibly have inspired the kind of loyalty and devotion that Seivarden obviously feels toward their fleet captain, but is quickly distracted as Seivarden caresses her stomach, skin on skin. Spending the next 20 minutes feeling rather than thinking suddenly seems like the obvious choice.

\-----

Twenty two minutes later, Ekalu arrives slightly late to inspect her Etrepas with a perfectly arranged uniform but slightly mussed hair and a noticeably more relaxed posture than usual. Her soldiers very carefully maintain their ancillary-like impassivity as she joins them for practice in the shooting range.

\------

Over the next few days Ekalu finds herself spending a surprising number of meals with her fellow officers.

Meals with Sir and Lieutenant Tisarwat continue to be awkward. Ekalu grows more comfortable with bragging on and defending her Etrepas, but gives up on attempting to start any other kind of conversation with them. Tisarwat seems disinclined to respond to anything she doesn’t feel obligated to respond to and their fleet captain doesn’t seem to find casual conversation at all natural. The last thing Ekalu wants to do is make Sir uncomfortable, so it seems wiser to let it go and to just eat as quickly as propriety allows.

Meals with Seivarden… well, they are certainly more fun, but they are also more complicated.

It would be hard for the two of them to have come from more drastically different backgrounds. Seivarden is from an old part of the Radch - a part that was an old part even a thousand years ago when Seivarden was young. She’s Radchaai through and through. She was raised as part of the old aristocracy with the expectation that anyone she had any significant interactions with would also come from that aristocracy. Ekalu can’t begin to imagine how much of a shock it must have been to wake up and realize that she had lost her ship, and a thousand years, and that the people, even many of the _houses_, that she saw as _her people_ are gone. She seems to have accepted her new role as lieutenant well, despite the fact that she used to be a captain. She seems to be making an active effort to treat Ekalu as her equal. But Seivarden can’t fully escape her upbringing. She makes assumptions and has prejudices that it never occurs to her to question and these come out in small ways at unexpected times. This makes it hard for Ekalu to trust her.

And Ekalu knows that Seivarden isn’t the only one making things tricky. Ekalu has to actively work to remember not to call Seivarden “Sir.” Where Seivarden is coming to terms with no longer being placed as highly as she once was, Ekalu struggles to accept the fact that she has been promoted higher than she ever even dreamed she might be. Her own experiences mean that her inclination is always to defer to Seivarden, to do what is needed to make her more comfortable, to avoid upsetting her. Even when doing so makes Ekalu herself more uncomfortable. Ekalu appreciates Seivarden’s effort to treat her as an equal and is trying to respond in kind, but they both struggle with it. The place they are trying to meet is a place where neither of them quite fits. All of this means Ekalu isn’t willing to let Seivaden completely through her masks and holds her at a bit of a distance. It means that the relationship they are trying to build is caught up in a tangled mass of conflicting emotions that Ekalu isn’t sure how to process.

Even so, not everything is complicated. Seivarden is gorgeous and seems to legitimately find Ekalu attractive, despite her provincial looks. And, well, once they get into the bedroom and speak more with actions than words they fit together rather nicely.

\-----

During her last watch shift before the end of the competition, Ekalu sits in Command studying the officer training manual, her shield flashing periodically. After a week of practice with the shield, triggering it has become an automatic response to the wide range of stimuli Ship uses as signals, so she can actually give most of her attention to the manual. She sets the manual aside for a few minutes when Etrepa Ten offers her tea, and smiles when Ten’s shield flashes up almost immediately after handing off the tea. Ekalu reaches out to Ship to ask after her decade’s progress. Ship displays the requested numbers in her vision and then adds, in her ear, “You know they are doing admirably, Lieutenant. Regardless of how the competition comes out you should be proud of them. And of yourself, for that matter.”

Ekalu tenses slightly and replies silently, “Ship… I’ve been spending so much time socializing that I could have been training or studying…”

Still in her ear, _Mercy of Kalr_ replies with a calm Ekalu envies. “Lieutenant, spending absolutely all of your time training and studying isn’t healthy. It is good for you to spend time socializing and relaxing. You’ve been through all of the training materials at least once and most of it twice. You were working on your numbers even before Fleet Captain gave the assignment and you are currently at the highest level in the shooting range of anyone other than the Fleet Captain herself. She also knows about and approves of you spending time with Lieutenant Seivarden. You are doing well, Lieutenant.”

Bo does end up winning the arrak, but Ekalu makes sure her Etrepas know that it was close and that she and Ship are both proud of their progress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to Gammarad for beta reading and helping me workshop the bits that weren't quite working. Her advice improved this chapter significantly! Any mistakes remaining are mine.
> 
> I wrote an additional bit of fluff from the perspectives of Etrepas Three and Four and Amaat Two. It can be found [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20826893).
> 
> .


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to Gammarad for being a very helpful beta <3
> 
> There are a few lines of dialogue directly from _Ancillary Sword_ included in this chapter.

Ekalu sits in her quarters sipping her morning tea and reflecting on how quickly this routine has started to feel normal as she half listens to Eight giving the morning report. At a gentle nudge from Ship, she refocuses on Eight.

“Ship says we will be reaching Athoek system in about two hours, while you are on watch. You should expect Fleet Captain to join you in Command.”

In response to Ekalu’s sudden spike of nervousness, Ship adds in her ear, “Lieutenant, you are the only officer who has experience with Athoek System. You are the most useful person to have in Command supporting Fleet Captain Breq when we arrive. You’ll do well.”

\-----

An hour and a half later Ekalu finds herself standing next to Sir, who is seated in the chair in Command, with Etrepas One and Four standing at the consoles. Etrepa One, speaking for Ship, briefly breaks in over Sir’s humming. 

“Thirty minutes to Athoek system.”

Ekalu tries to relax. Nothing is going to happen over the next thirty minutes while they are still in gate space. Most likely nothing interesting is going to happen when they arrive. She would really like a bowl of tea, but now isn’t the time. They are exiting gate space in just under half an hour. As per protocol, everything on the ship either has been (or is in the process of being) secured, including the tea things. 

\-----

“Fifteen minutes to Athoek system.” 

Sir has progressed from humming to singing quietly, though clearly off key, in some language Ekalu doesn’t recognise. Captain Vel and her Amaat Lieutenant would have been joking with each other, talking about what they were looking forward to doing when they arrived. Ekalu remembers finding their conversation inane and wishing they would just be quiet when she was the one standing at the console as a common soldier. Ekalu supposes Sir’s singing beats that, and she suspects that standing here in complete silence would be more stressful. The current song seems to have a chorus and, after hearing it a few times, Ekalu finds herself humming along. When she realizes what she is doing she is immediately embarrassed and almost stops herself, but Ship flashes a note of encouragement in her vision. 

\-----

“One minute to Athoek system.”

Ekalu does her best to keep her breathing even as she takes a handhold and braces herself, just in case.

\-----

The nothingness of gate space gives way and Ekalu relaxes slightly at the familiar sight of Athoek system as Etrepa One reports, “We are in Athoek System, Fleet Captain.”

Ship begins flashing an assortment of different views and bits of data into Ekalu’s vision. Ekalu gestures for it to stop when it shows her what appears to be a Sword patrolling near the Ghost Gate. The only Sword that should be here is _Sword of Atagaris_, but it feels odd for it be guarding the Ghost Gate… Especially since she doesn’t see any signs of _Mercy of Phey _and _Mercy of Ilves _anywhere. At Ship’s encouragement, Ekalu gives Sir these observations. When Sir questions the name of the Ghost Gate, Ekalu is hit with a wave of embarrassment. It’s a ridiculous name born of equally ridiculous stories and superstitions. And Sir wants her to explain? Thankfully Sir seems content with a vague explanation. 

Everything seems to be going more or less smoothly and Ekalu talks herself into suggesting that tea she has been wanting for some time. Thankfully Sir agrees. Etrepa Four sets about making tea as efficiently as she always does. A couple minutes later, as Four hands the first bowl to Sir, Ekalu watches _Sword of Atagaris _vanish and notes that Sir very abruptly stops humming, freezes, and then appears to shudder. _Sword of Atagaris _disappearing like that is strange, but Ekalu is more worried about what is happening with Sir. She gestures to Four to hold off on her tea for just a moment and turns to her fleet captain. “Sir, are you all right?”

Before she gets a response, _Mercy of Kalr _very suddenly moves, Ekalu stumbles slightly, and they are back in gate space. Sir seems to have recovered from whatever happened and gives a quick run down of the situation. Ekalu is startled and confused enough by the situation to actually try to work through it verbally, even with Sir sitting there. Sir’s confirmation that she suspects _Sword of Atagaris _is acting aggressively puts Ekalu on edge. It’s strange. Ekalu wouldn’t expect that from _Sword of Atagaris_. In her experience, Captain Hetnys makes sure her ship and crew carry out their orders and at least nominally do their patrols, but Athoek has been peaceful for long enough that patrols here are routine. Captain Hetnys won’t have heard from Omaugh recently, so she shouldn’t have any new orders reflecting the recent upheaval. A military ship gating in unexpectedly would be worth contacting, but not worth gating to... It takes less than a minute for them to reenter Athoek system and then it’s only 10 seconds until _Sword of Atagaris _reappears, but it feels much, much longer. 

Then Ship plays the warning _Sword of Atagaris _sends and Ekalu immediately comes back to herself. She knows that voice and has a hard time taking it seriously. If it were Captain Hetnys that would be one thing, but her Amaat Lieutenant? She’s good enough at following orders and at pompous bluster, but unlikely to have the gumption to follow through on any threats. 

In her ear, Ship says, “Lieutenant, I know you recognize her. You should let Fleet Captain Breq know who she’s dealing with.”

So Ekalu does and Sir snaps back at _Sword of Atagaris_ with more natural authority in her voice than the Amaat Lieutenant could ever come close to mustering. Over the course of the exchange Ekalu slips back into her mask of ancillary-like blankness. Hearing the Amaat Lieutenant scrambling to explain herself as Sir effortlessly dresses her down is more satisfying than Ekalu really wants to admit, even to herself. At the same time, it serves as a stark reminder of exactly who Ekalu is dealing with on her own ship. Sir is a Mianaai. And the lieutenant _does_ have a connection to Mianaai, however tenuous. 

The conversation finishes and Sir turns to Ekalu. “You are acquainted with this officer?”

Acquainted is one word for it. Ekalu has spent plenty of time in Command quietly on watch as Amaat One, listening while her former Amaat Lieutenant and the _Sword of Atagaris _Amaat Lieutenant chatted away. The lieutenant in question only ever paid any attention to her as a curiosity, a _human_ soldier rather than the obviously superior ancillaries she had on her own ship. As far as Ekalu can tell she is extremely arrogant and mostly useless, but Ekalu understands politics well enough to be wary of stating this bluntly and instead settles on, “Water will wear away stone, sir.” She hopes that this will get the point across while not completely burning her own bridges if Sir cares about the lieutenant’s connections. When Sir doesn’t reply, Ekalu remembers that Sir was, presumably, away on Special Missions for some time and might not be as aware of all of the social politics as one would expect a Mianaai to be. Just in case, she adds, “Her family is good. Genealogy as long as your arm.” She recites the line she has heard entirely too many times, “Her mother is second cousin to the granddaughter of a client of a client of Mianaai itself, Sir.”

Then Sir asks whether Captain Hetnys would have left orders to attack anything that came into the system. Ekalu can’t imagine why she would have left those orders. And if something _is _going on in this system to justify it, Ekalu would have expected her to be on her ship ready to react and not down on the station. At the same time… It’s a miracle the Amaat Lieutenant was even paying enough attention to notice _Mercy of Kalr_’s appearance in the first place, especially if her captain isn’t on board, and Ekalu wouldn’t be surprised if _Sword of Atagaris _had to call her attention to it. It would _never _have occurred to her to make the move she did if she wasn’t acting under _some_ sort of orders… 

“I wouldn’t think so, sir. But the lieutenant isn’t exactly… imaginative, sir.” Remembering what her grandmother used to always say about a cousin who never seemed to have any thoughts of her own, Ekalu continues, “Knees stronger than her head.” And then, worried that she has overstepped the bounds of propriety, hurriedly adds, “Begging the fleet captain’s indulgence.”

Ekalu starts to get nervous as Sir sits there silently, face as expressionless as any of her crewmates. She gestures to Ship asking whether she has messed up or if there is anything she should be doing.

In her ear, Ship replies, “Fleet Captain isn’t pleased with the situation as a whole, but she’s not at all upset with you. Just give her a minute. You are doing well, Lieutenant.”

Four finally hands Ekalu the bowl of tea that she had requested before _Sword of Atagaris _decided to jump. Ekalu gestures her thanks.

Soon Sir starts humming again and a few minutes later Ship announces to everyone that they will be entering gatespace in one minute to get closer to the station. 

Before they jump, Sir has_ Mercy of Kalr _send a message ahead to Athoek Station to expect their arrival. Then they are back in gatespace and Sir leaves Ekalu in Command with her Etrepas and goes to coordinate a group to head to the station. 

A couple hours later, near the end of Ekalu’s shift, Sir returns to Command just before they exit gate space much closer to the station. This time, Sir gestures for Ekalu to stay seated and stands next to her, humming. Station greets them promptly and courteously, as expected, and Ekalu listens quietly as Sir and Ship negotiate a shuttle docking time and lodgings on the station. When everything is sorted, Sir calls for Seivarden. As she arrives, Ekalu rises and moves to stand at attention next to Seivarden. It’s one thing to stay seated in the command chair at Sir’s instruction, but it would not be proper for her to be seated in Command in the presence of both of her ranking officers. 

“Lieutenants,” Sir nods to them both, “Lieutenant Tisarwat and I will be leaving shortly for Athoek Station. I am not, at present, entirely sure how long we will be there.” Ekalu notices Seivarden shifting slightly at this, seemingly uncomfortable, and resists the urge to reach out to her. Sir continues, “While we are gone, I trust that the two of you will make sure everything is taken care of here on Ship. _Mercy of Kalr_ should, of course, be able to reach me quickly if anything unexpected comes up, but if I can’t be reached for any reason, Lieutenant Seivarden has command.” 

“Yes, Sir.” Ekalu responds, noting that Seivarden’s response is a little behind hers, just the slightest bit hesitant. She knows why she would be hesitant herself in Seivarden’s position, but is confused by the fact that Seivarden seems to be.

“Seivarden, you are also in charge of sorting out a new schedule. Bo One will be in charge of her decade, but let’s hold off on assigning her to watch until we figure out what is going on in this System.”

This time Seivarden doesn’t seem to hesitate as she responds, “Yes, Sir.”

With this, Sir turns to leave and for a moment Seivarden looks like she is going to follow her, but she holds herself back. Ekalu turns to Seivarden and reaches out to gently touch her arm, not quite sure what Seivarden is worried about, but wanting to make sure she knows she has Ekalu’s support. 

Seivarden takes a deep breath, releases it and then turns to Ekalu with an easy smile. “I should go work on those schedules. I’ll be in the decade room. Come find me when your shift is done?” 

Ekalu smiles back. “Of course.” If Seivarden doesn’t want to talk about whatever it is, Ekalu certainly understands that. 

As Ekalu starts to move back to her seat to finish her watch, Seivarden catches her hand and bows over it, smirks slightly and then sweeps off before Ekalu can collect herself enough to respond. 


End file.
